How to teach your child to hear the first time?
This text I found on the Internet and just can’t help but post on our website. Children often can’t hear what we adults tell them, and this problem is quite popular. The author of the text is not just a mother but a teacher, psychologist and art therapist in one person – Anna Bykova. So:
Not a simple question. Even adults sometimes don’t hear the first time. After all, about men, and about the staff often hear such complaints: “I say, I say, and as the wall peas. Here’s how another man to say?” But maybe these adults have grown from children who have not learned to hear the first time? Try to teach this child still stands.
The algorithm is as follows:
1. First of all, make sure you listen carefully.
It happens that the child is absorbed in play or work and really can’t hear. By the way, I when writing a text or develop a training program that is so focused on process that is totally off from reality. So I at this point have heard, you either have very very loudly to call, or to touch. The second option is nicer. Don’t like loud noises. Therefore itself in a similar situation too, I put my hand on his shoulder, drawing attention to yourself, even a little to himself to deploy. And just making sure that I managed to be in the spotlight, beginning to speak.
Have you ever talked with a young child who really wants to tell you something important? Which is already drowning in her own words, to be able to tell you whatever is there. The child in this case is usually even fixes the adult head with both hands to hold the attention. Yes, grabs plump palms, so that an adult could not turn away. And then suddenly turn away and not hear the important importance. I remember a funny incident when my dad said two Arseny: “I’m listening. Just please, let go of my ears” .
Keep your child’s ears are completely unnecessary. But you can hold him by the shoulders. In principle, it is enough to set eyes eye contact. If I 100% saw, the probability that I will hear, is substantially increased. When you say something in the eye, it is very difficult to skip past the ears. I watched as the younger group of kindergarten, when something I want to say buddy, hands unfold it to yourself. They sincerely want to be heard.
It is very important to refer to it by name. Or even just to turn. It is written without recourse – this is most likely to appeal to nowhere and the effect of this no. The teaching experience I can say that the “Remove toys” flies past much more often than the “Boys, their eyes on me lifted! It was time for lunch. Begin to remove the toys”
2. Make sure that the child you really heard.
Listened and heard – this is not the same thing. Visual people like and listened, and he looked into my eyes, and maybe even nodding or “was Pokal”, and the thoughts somewhere far away was. Just in case, better to ask again. Something like this: “You heard me? What I asked? Kate, now what do we do?” And if the answer coincided with what you have said – congratulations, you are heard. This is only the first time it seems that too many “lip”. Then it became a habit and all well received.
I realized five minutes later dinner.
As they say, listen and don’t say you never heard of.
3. Agree about the consequences.
“I say, I say, and as the wall peas” . Of course. If “I say, I say”, then you can continue to talk, talk, talk… Why hear the first time, if the third and the fifth? To teach to hear the first time, you need to speak once. And to warn about the consequences: “I’m not going to set the table twice”, “He who in time will not come to the table, will go hungry”, etc. Or will myself to warm up and set the table. Depends on the agreement.
Anyone who has not heard that I must remove the toys will be in the evening to sit without toys. In kindergarten General rule: “Who doesn’t clean, he doesn’t play “.
Anyone who has not heard: “Bring me dirty things, I run the washing” . – will his hands to wash his pants. Not because I am bad. And because the pants need tomorrow, and the washing machine late at night I don’t think it can be during spinning her sound disturbs the sleep of the innocent neighbors in a block of flats.
Anyone who has not heard: “Need to dress. If after 10 minutes you do not leave, we will be late for the movie” . – late in the movie.
Of course, for this to work, it is necessary that the arrangement was always performed and the consequences came.
By the way, for adults this algorithm also works. I checked. «Control, not deposited before the deadline, not going to check. Late with the delivery automatically log in the column for the control paint “2”” Severely. But deadlines students heard the first time.
ATTENTION! Very important additions for the application of the algorithm. Required reading.
Do not apply the third paragraph without the first two. Is inhumane.
To teach children not only consequences, but also by personal example. So, be sure to hear your child the first time.